


Letters With Lockhart

by Isis



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Epistolary, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-08-01
Updated: 2004-08-01
Packaged: 2018-02-24 12:21:25
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,370
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2581310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Isis/pseuds/Isis
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Correspondence between the Potions master and the internationally famous yet naturally blond author, during the summer before <i>Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets</i>.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letters With Lockhart

**Author's Note:**

>   Written for the pornish_pixies "Fantasy Fest" challenge.

Dear Mr Lockhart,

I recently purchased your book _Gadding With Ghouls_ and found it very interesting reading indeed. However, I was wondering if you could perhaps clarify for me the incident on page 96.  I was under the impression that incubi, being male demons, only molested females; similarly I had assumed that my attraction (if I may be blunt) to members of my own rather than the opposite sex would keep me from being bothered by the manifestations of succubi.  As you have only two sentences describing the encounter, I can not determine whether it is a typographical error, or if I must be wary of attack from this class of creature.  If the latter is the case, any more explicit suggestion or direction would be appreciated, since (as I have pointed out) your description in the book is quite brief.

Sincerely yours,

S. Snape

* * *

Dear Mr Snape,

I am delighted that you enjoyed my tales of adventure!  And I'm sure you'll be delighted to know that I have a new book coming out later this summer.  It's my autobiography - _Magical Me!_ \- so be sure to purchase a copy!

In regards to your question about the incubus incident, you must realize that my publisher insists that I keep certain details out of print.  After all, I do have a certain reputation to uphold among the witches, and my books are beloved by all ages.  And I'm sure you wouldn't want your little niece or nephew to learn about sex magic, ha ha!  But if you show me that you're over the age of seventeen, I imagine I can share a few details - and if you're handsome and single, perhaps I can share a few more!

Please enjoy the enclosed signed photo, and thank you for writing!

Yours,

Gilderoy Lockhart

* * *

Dear Mr Lockhart,

I look forward to your new book, as I have enjoyed all your books so far.   I am quite flattered that you took the time to write to me, and I hope you will fulfil the promise of your letter and divulge the details of your incubus encounter.

While I can not pretend to be handsome, I am certainly single and well over the age of seventeen, as you can see from the enclosed photograph.    I am currently the Potions master at a well-regarded wizards' and witches' school, although I have hopes that I may be appointed to the post of instructor of Defence Against the Dark Arts for the coming term.

Looking forward to your reply,

S. Snape

* * *

Dear "S.",

Ah, a Potions master!  How divine the elixirs that you must mix, how clever and precise you must be to create magic in your cauldron!  Why, I myself am known to brew a powerful Forgetfulness Draught.  Just a single drop, perfectly odourless and tasteless, saved me from a particularly gruesome death at the hands of - but I digress.

You ask about the intimate experience that was nearly my undoing.  As you know, the incubi and succubi are demon lovers, each one taking the exact form most desired by its victim. I was in a small village in Hungary when one came to me as I lay sleeping, coalescing above me into the shape of a comely young dark-haired man. 

Looking at the photograph you so kindly sent me, I can see echoes of its face in the noble lines of yours.  The thought makes me want to recreate that creature's touch with my own hand as I gaze upon your photograph.  Or perhaps I'm imagining what _your_ touch might be like.

When the incubus came to me, I thought at first that it was a dream.  And what a dream it was!  But perhaps I will not yet tell you the lascivious acts that demon performed on me before I was able to banish it.  I will trade my secrets for one of yours.  

Do you look at my photograph and touch yourself, as I look upon yours?

Temptingly,

Gilderoy - and do call me that, please, "Mr Lockhart" makes me feel so very old.

* * *

Dear Gilderoy,

Physical features do not affect me, as I am attracted to intellect and ability, not to mere form.  It is your letters that excite every part of me.  If I had your skill with words, I would say more.  

I am anxious to hear what happened between you and the incubus.

Awaiting your reply,

S. Snape

* * *

My dear mysterious S.,

How delightful to know that as you read this you may be taking yourself in hand, stroking that hard thick cock of yours, running your fingers down its length.   It is thick, I'm sure of it - thick and long, and oh, I would just love to take it in my mouth and show you that I have skills other than simply banishing monsters.  Wouldn't you enjoy that?

Are you touching yourself now?

Would you rather know what I did with the incubus, or what I would do with you?

What does "S." stand for?

With anticipation,

Gilderoy

* * *

Dear Gilderoy,

Yes, damn you.   All of it.

Sincerely,

~~S. Snape~~ Severus

* * *

My dearest Severus,

What a lovely name that is.  Quite fitting your severe expression, as you look out of your photograph at me.   Ah, but I see your expression change as I remove my robes.  Yes, all for you.   It's a pity you can't see what your photograph sees - my muscled chest, my narrow waist, my hard prick poking out of a naturally blond thatch of hair.  Oh, yes, I'm hard just thinking about you, my Severus.   I prop your picture up on a stack of books and push my chair away from the desk just enough that it can get a good look.

My quill is in my right hand, and my cock is in my left.  I'm just barely skimming my fingertips against the skin, now, just teasing myself imagining your touch.  Ooh, but now I want more.  Need more.  My hand is closing around my cock, and it feels very good as I slide back and forth, and I'm sure you can barely read this now, as my penmanship deteriorates with the pleasure.   I'd best exchange for a Dict-o-Quill.

Ah, yes, much better.  Much better, with two hands free to touch myself.  Can you imagine how I'm stroking myself, pretending these are your hands?   Maybe your mouth.   Oh, yes, I'd fuck your mouth, wrap my fingers in your hair, mm.  I'd come so hard and you'd swallow it all, wouldn't you?  And then you'd turn me around and push my legs apart and slick up your fingers and fuck me with them.  Just like I'm doing now, oh, my fingers.  Imagining they're your fingers.  Oh.   Oh, like that.  Uh.

And then you'd push into me, your hard cock.  Oh.   Your thick, hard, oh.   Fuck.  Ungh.  Oh.   FUCK!

Well, my dear Severus, it's a pity that photograph you sent only shows above the waist.   I think your image is looking rather interested.  I hope you are, too.

Lasciviously yours,

Gil

* * *

Dear Gilderoy,

As you might expect I enjoyed your letter very much when I received it last night.   I was hoping to enjoy it again in the morning, but as you apparently laid a time-destructive charm on it, it had already crumbled into dust.  I must confess I was a tad disappointed. Will you write me another?

Yours,

Severus

* * *

My darling Sev,

I am so sorry that I couldn't leave you with that keepsake!  But I could not allow the possibility of something so revealing to fall into the hands of one who might wish me ill.  Not that I doubt your affection, of course.  But who knows who might discover it in your room?   My reputation would be tattered, my books left unread on the shelves.  And I have additional reason to guard my reputation now that I have been engaged as, would you believe, a teacher?  Yes, I have been hired to teach Defence Against the Dark Arts at that most prestigious of institutions, Hogwarts School of Wizardry and Witchcraft!   But of course I will write you another letter as soon as I am settled in my new home.

Tantalizingly,

Gil

* * *

Mr Lockhart,

Fuck you.

Sincerely,

S. Snape


End file.
